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How To Short-Circuit The Fear Of Rejection

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Do you ever feel like the fear of rejection is holding you back?... Discover The 4 Emotions You Need To Make a Killer First Impression: http://bit.ly/2C43VD8 Like maybe there's someone that you would have really liked to ask out, someone that you've had your eye on for a long time, but when you think about asking them out you think about them maybe saying no. Rejecting you. So you don't even want to try. Or maybe you're an artist of some kind and you'd like to share your art, you'd like to publish it, you'd like to maybe even pursue it as a career... for me, this was writing. But, when you think about being criticized or rejected for that art, you don't even want to throw your hat in the ring. If that's something that you can relate to, the good news is that you don't have to continue to relate to it because there's people in the world that are basically immune to rejection! They don't feel it in the same way that you might, and they don't fear it. And the only difference between them and someone who has issues with rejection that were kind of fears it is the way that they perceive it in their mind and that's what we're covering today. How can you make those quick little rejection tweaks? They're gonna make rejection kind of feel like something that just rolls off your back like nothing at all! Rejection Mindsets and Strategies: 0:57 Think of a time that you have been rejected exercise. 1:15 Disassociate yourself from the rejection. 2:44 Broaden your perspective and goals of being rejected. 4:20 Success is a numbers game (roll the dice). 5:50 STOP using the word "Rejection" Subscribe to Charisma On Command’s YouTube Account: http://bit.ly/COC-Subscribe Connect With Us Further: Website: http://www.charismaoncommand.com Facebook: http://facebook.com/charismaoncommand Periscope: https://www.periscope.tv/charismaon Or if you want to see my personal stuff (my regular life + me playing music): Instagram: @CharlieHoupert Periscope: @CharlieHoupert
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Text Comments (1186)
20GRIZZ20 (4 days ago)
Dude I watched some of your videos and it just made me say fuck it and go ask out this dime from work, but when I went out to talk to her, I literally walked up on her giving head...
Sara A (8 days ago)
Ok ill ask him out while get rejected give him a laugh 😂 just to show that i dont care
Violet D'Saint (12 days ago)
2019 - I have said NO to life coaches after a session not because I didn't want to carry on, not because I wasn't benefiting, not because I didn't like the person. It was because I was to embarrassed to tell them I was broke. I look rich, I act rich, I talk rich. I am not rich. Not even close. My money is being sucked out and I owe every penny I have goes some where else. So do I spend my money on a life coach or do I pay my rent, house bills. I will pay those bills and buy food first before I spend it on a life coach. My NO wasn't about them. It was about me.
Momo (15 days ago)
My future kids have you to thank for their lives.
pixel yt (17 days ago)
Man your awesome, i have a fear of being rejected because im really shy. Should i ask her to be my date for the dance thats happening at my school?
Angel Carrillo (18 days ago)
Great ! Also you said doo doo hahaha
Gebrina Coutee (20 days ago)
This was 10mins of shear incredibleness... Ty ty ty
mouthymormonmetalhea (21 days ago)
Why is Joseph Smith charismatic? Or L. Ron Hubbard?
Your Keto Best Friend (23 days ago)
I freaking love you for this video. It’s literally the perfect video u I needed in my life rn.
Charisma on Command (21 days ago)
~ Glad you're digging it!
David Otarres (26 days ago)
Your smile scares me
Will Rees Young (26 days ago)
You’re a weird looking bloke
Brahiam Dorado (1 month ago)
“They just weren’t into what I look like.” Story of my life.
MegaMissfitz (1 month ago)
Snigger snigger 😤😤😤
Wolf NZ Outdoors (1 month ago)
I fully agree with not taking it on board as a sign of not being worthy. One of the biggest turning-points in my life was disassociating "no" from my feeling of self-worth; realising it wasn't "me as a person" that was being rejected. It's the _request_ that's being rejected and there are millions of reasons why, in that time and place, that request might be rejected, very few of which have to do with the requestor. It might be a matter of criteria the requestee has to work by, a matter of resources or time, a matter of the requestee's personal tastes.
Pedo Bear (1 month ago)
Loved the video, im now in jail because of it.
Arup Mullick (1 month ago)
These videos are so bad compared to your GOT or JamesBond or Marvel Superhero Videos
Yootoob Blows (1 month ago)
IF DIS GURL DEOSNT LIKE ME.... IM GUNNA DYE
Arturo Ricaforte (1 month ago)
You dont get it most of the people who post in youtube that talks about rejection its always about love and shit the real rejection is about youre an outcast and no one literally likes you wherever you like if youre ugly and shit they will all laugh at you in family gaderings they gon say hes the only ugly one in your family,lets get out here hes extremely ugly its so easy to say that rejection is part of success and shit but what if you get rejected by who you are! Who you are man its sucks coz they reject you the real you its a fuck up thing to experience!!!!!
Alain Baraka (1 month ago)
That last point “the word rejection” 🤾🏽‍♂️🚽
Ezequiel Runner (1 month ago)
Why don't you have a Patreon??
Tmerric M (1 month ago)
Talk too much. Get to the point
Ashley Smith (2 months ago)
I'm asking out the girl on Christmas lol
Charlie Goldkamp (2 months ago)
Every girl is either taken or chasing after another guy who’s not me so why bother
Jermey Muren (2 months ago)
I wanna go out and get rejected
BMW Rider (2 months ago)
Amazing video bro keep it going .
Charisma on Command (2 months ago)
~ Thanks :-)
Zander Curiel (2 months ago)
My go-to strategy for handling rejection is remembering that it’s happened before and I’ve gotten over it before so it’s no big deal. It’s like being bulletproof, if being bulletproof meant getting shot multiple times till it didn’t bother you as much. :)
Marius Braun (2 months ago)
Thank you for your advice, Charlie! There's this cute girl that I would like to ask out, and you inspired me to go for it the next time I see her!
Marius Braun (1 month ago)
Okay, so I did ask her out and she said no. But that's okay! At least I had the courage to go for it.
Silver Kane (2 months ago)
It's great to watch the video and your the who doesn't care about rejection you fell powerful Ps my english is weak
Hi9hli9ht (2 months ago)
Do you guys think being 27 is too old to approach a girl on college campus? Would they assume i was looking for sex?
Serious Peter1 (2 months ago)
Chris Hemsworth
UrBrainOnSports (3 months ago)
I'm only 2 years late to watching this
Mandy Reans (3 months ago)
I actually love you all
ThatPianoGuy (3 months ago)
Thank you so much for doing this.
HeXiC BeA3Tz Gaming (3 months ago)
I really want to go out with this girl that I’ve had a crush on for a year and a half and me and one of her best friends have had beef for years lol, should I get to know her better or drop it?
Eadyt87 (3 months ago)
Its by FAR more IMPORTANT to having a charisma fo getting a JOB than to attracts a girls,,, well girls are NEED MONEY and to get the money is to get a JOB! Job, job, job, then girl!
Just Lennie (3 months ago)
STOP STOP STOP with these how to? please talk about your experience.
Ana (3 months ago)
This is sad of me to watch this *Alexa play despacito*
Jacob Foster (4 months ago)
I don’t care about getting rejected unless i know them longer than like 2 years
Jokeré (4 months ago)
She rejected me ayyy :^)
Daphne The Lich Queen (4 months ago)
Dude i just cant i have been in same class with that girl whole high school and ik that first 2 years she prob think't of me that im some off nerd since shes kinda a bitchy type of a girl and prob doesn't like that type of guys but idk 3rd and 4th year of high school i just got into my looks and that stuff and noticed X times that she looks at me with that *I want you* look bu still idk im scared to ask her any thing since i didn't talk much with her in high school and now when high school is over now im even more confused and i don't know how and in what whey ask her to go out side with me one some date.
Max Rowe (4 months ago)
All I could focus on was how wide this guy's mouth is
A Talking Afro (4 months ago)
The key part of this video is the segment on it being a numbers game. You really do have to just the roll the dice a hell of a lot more than everyone else around you and come to terms with luck being a factor. Absolutely love that part.
Nick Gold (4 months ago)
this guy really inspired me I’ll try tomorrow
Nick Gold (4 months ago)
I’m a virgin
Baby K (5 months ago)
This video was very helpful thank you! It‘s such a great viiiiid🙏🏽😍
Charisma on Command (4 months ago)
~ Glad you found it helpful!
Oliver Clothesoff (5 months ago)
Honestly this video is filled with advice, but as someone who feels like they’re on a bit of a cusp of a charisma breakthrough, these videos are basically inspiration porn. Thank you all so much for making these and making them available for everyone!
Roberto Sanmartin (5 months ago)
Charlie, i really love your videos, they been a really great help, first to endure a really hard situation and long depressión, and now to build my self and make my future step by step. really thanks 4 everything.
Charisma on Command (5 months ago)
~ Happy to hear you've found our videos helpful and glad that they're making a positive impact. :-)
Tom van der wulp (5 months ago)
“First thing to do is think of a time that you’ve been rejected...” which one of the 1727282819937329222 times?
A Thug By Choice (5 months ago)
Thanks Charlie.
ReasonableRadio (5 months ago)
This all seems like good advice but there's one issue that I don't think it addresses. When it comes to dating, it's a number game, but when you factor in social opportunities to find someone who you're genuinely attracted to, whatever standards you might have (which you discussed) and a connection; each rejection could mean many months alone. If you ask too many people, you will get a bad reputation. You can certainly spend that time on self improvement but you can end up sinking into a bad place between opportunities, wondering why you are the kind of person who is single all the time. Maybe it's just social circumstances that make opportunities spaced and rejections stick with you or maybe it's character or social status. It's something that troubles me a lot either way.
Mother Mercury (5 months ago)
La media sonrisa
19swaggkidd (5 months ago)
love how you address all the skeletons in my closet lol
ChikiruMEL (5 months ago)
next time i'll see the boy i like ill ask him out
Toby Walker (5 months ago)
Hey I know you probably want read this but this video has made me more confident about asking out a girl and I will write back on Monday once I ask her
Toby Walker (5 months ago)
Meant to say *wont
Julie Wedam (6 months ago)
Thanks again Charlie! "Rejection = someone looking at you in totality as a person and saying 'not worthy' ". As soon as I heard that I realized "wait that's not even possible in a job interview because they cannot know anyone in totality as a person within that short time frame". I see how much of a fallacy "rejection" actually is. Wish I could give you a hug right now. You have no idea (or maybe you do) of how much this means to me. I wish I had found your channel sooner. Would've saved me a lot of heartache.
yornav123 (6 months ago)
Dude , you really nailed some problems, I am Struggling with for years. When I read your comments people are very great full for what your doing. So am I . Why don't u open a PayPal( or something like that ) account so people can donate. I I'm not that kind of person who will buy a lecture , but I wil donate something after I heard something good . I think a lot of people wil do
Leon Louis (6 months ago)
Hehe rejection is sweet. It's a learning experience!!
Nicole L (6 months ago)
Recently was not selected for two different jobs.At first it felt very personal but this video has helped me see the truer picture.I will continue to seek other opportunities without the fear of rejection ^_^
Kinga Gorski (6 months ago)
Rejection is such a harsh word.. not in my vocab. :-)
Jeff Bilyeu (6 months ago)
I'm a licensed therapist and I feel like I get so much from this channel. Very great content that actually sticks in my mind! I apply so much of this to my life. I rephrased "rejection" to "it wasn't a good fit." Thanks again, Charlie.
Charisma on Command (6 months ago)
~ Glad you're getting value from the channel Jeff!
Mistique Moon (6 months ago)
I've been struggling with a fear of getting my book published, putting it out there for every publisher and agent to say "no" to. This has helped a lot, thank you.
Charisma on Command (6 months ago)
~ Glad you found it helpful! Best of luck with the book. :-)
Stronk Komrade (7 months ago)
let's if shes interested..
Matt M. (7 months ago)
These videos are great! Keep up the good work.
William Nunn (7 months ago)
Good video, i hate rejection. I compare it with a drug high wearing off. I reframe it with the fact its moving you toward people and places that is right for you
Thanh Le (7 months ago)
Hi Charlie. I just discovered your channel. I just want to say thank you for what you are doing. I've learned a lot from your videos.#keepupthegoodworks
Mason Smith (7 months ago)
Your videos are so good at changing mindsets! Thanks, this is great!
Charisma on Command (7 months ago)
~ Hope you find it helpful!
hadi weslati (7 months ago)
Make your videos shorter then 8min...4min will be enough ! it's a feedback Big Hello from TUNISIA <3
Memey Lad TV (7 months ago)
Can we get a big F in chat for me being rejected today thanks
Adarsh Gaurav (7 months ago)
Thanks . It really helped
Charisma on Command (7 months ago)
~ Glad to hear that :-)
kowsi kowsi (8 months ago)
Jordan Potter (8 months ago)
You rock! 🤘😝😝😎
I Love Me (8 months ago)
Trueee!!! Love your videos! Learning a lot from your channel :) thanks a lot!
Charisma on Command (8 months ago)
~ Glad to hear it :-)
Evan Kwantes (8 months ago)
"rejection is a step in the right direction"
david Carter (8 months ago)
that was some awesome practical advice. Lovin' this channel
Charisma on Command (8 months ago)
~ Glad you're digging the channel David!
Caden Hearron (9 months ago)
you will miss 100% of the shots you don’t take
Crochet Delight (9 months ago)
I love how specific you are in your explanations. From time to time I am afraid of "rejection" but over the years I have learned that, we only live once, so we need to be the best us that we can be, and try to live without regret. Later on in life there will be things we regret not doing, all simply because we were afraid of being "rejected". Because what's more important? Being rejected or being yourself and taking chances on things like asking someone out that you like, or going after a job? Always be yourself and take some chances. This video reminded me of that because recently I've been too afraid to ask out a guy that I am quite smitten with. Thank you for another great life experience video.
lynagy him (9 months ago)
When in doubt whip it out. Ladies love that.
91Sapphire (9 months ago)
it is so easy for perfect human eing like you talking about these stuff
AlexMeow bleufeline (9 months ago)
Lol that skill set is called "I'm not a girl and he's not gay". I think I'll go with "move the fuck on" and not ask him out.
Hannah Evans (9 months ago)
You should make a podcast! (Seriously, please do, you have been such a great help to me).
Noname Freespirit (10 months ago)
Really useful video. You're so smart! :)
Tina Cudal (10 months ago)
Fear is subconscious, not conscious.
Mike (10 months ago)
Yeah this is all really good in theory.
1h0mas (11 months ago)
What if the girl who rejected you goes in your class and you see her everyday. This is hard dealing with...
Okay then whatever (11 months ago)
I LIKE DUCKS
Ace Legacy (11 months ago)
The road to success is made of many failures.
Kim C Hutcheon (11 months ago)
You are a GREAT teacher, you are teaching me to be fearless. Thank you.
Charisma on Command (11 months ago)
~ Appreciate it Kim!
Louis Ricciardi (11 months ago)
Great video. Love the perspective.
Blackveilblasphemy (11 months ago)
if you never try, you'll never know, just what you're worth
LtSerge (1 year ago)
favorite video of this channel so far
Charisma on Command (1 year ago)
~ Glad you're digging it!
gulag humor (1 year ago)
I just got used to it
Relax Gang (1 year ago)
Why do i wanna get rejected
Alvaro Hernandez (1 year ago)
I finally asked out the girl I liked and she said yes thanks for the motivation
JackGeezy (1 year ago)
I'm an expert at rejection 😔
Raphael Miranda (1 year ago)
Really liked your video. Learnt alot today. Thanks!
Varun Raheja (1 year ago)
Every video I watch.. I wish I had watched it before
Bernardo Fernandes (1 year ago)
What about when you know you were rejected only for been black?
Hanna F (1 year ago)
Thanks. I really need to hear this message today!😀
Kaynã de Oliveira (1 year ago)
You helped me a lot. Thank you so much
Charisma on Command (1 year ago)
~ Our pleasure!
Jiller (1 year ago)
yes i dont care what anybody says i will continue to pursue my dreams <3
Charisma on Command (1 year ago)
~ Awesome!

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