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Why Does Your Ex Still Want to Be Friends

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Text Comments (93)
LRF49 (4 days ago)
No to being friends. Only time you should accept it, is if you guys were good friends before you got into the relationship. If not, say no to friends. If you can't have them, they can't have you as a friend. Nuff said.
martina thom (20 days ago)
I would not be friends with an ex, one its done its done.. im going to move on and forget they even existed
Sofia Del Ramos (1 month ago)
I’m crying. Thank you so so much! I needed these words. ❤️
Clown Earz (3 months ago)
I just let them say theybwant to be friends and then i just go with the flow. Tell them its all good and then tell them you're busy and go m.i.a. let them hit you up again and be the normal, awesome guy you you are, but play a bit hard to get. Usually there is some sort of negative feeling(s) for you when they distance themselves; just agree to it so that they know they can reach out to you and rekindle the relationship when they figure themselves out.
Rukus Cage (3 months ago)
My ex hurt me , than wanted to be my friend , I couldn't get over it and my emotions were running so high at 4 months later it ended up we can't be friends
Gaming Central (3 months ago)
Thank u
Reya's Corner (5 months ago)
I don't know, maybe this says something about me but, I'm not friends with ANY of my exes. If I see them out in public I'll say hi. But to stay friends with them on social media and "hang out" with them NO. Especially during that period where you are still grieving what "was" or if you put up with a lot of BS from them. Nope, I'm good, bye bye
Shawna Springall (6 months ago)
Its been too hard for me being friends. We've only been broken up for a few weeks but calls me for favors like rides and to sleep on my couch. It kills me inside cause I still very much love him and now our relationship is totally different. Im not sure what we even are or where this is leading. I feel its leading probably nowhere and possibly he calls me cause he has no other options as of favors from others. It makes me kind of feel used and taken advantage of but I'm allowing it because of my feelings for him. Its just gonna hurt me bad in the end.
Linda Nguyen (6 months ago)
Just be friends first and see how it goes obviously if they ask to be friend then meaning they still care n still love you , well if u guys are friends do not bring the past up talk about everything else but don't show him you're sad or hurt it won't help; then later on when they sure about u then ya will get back together
Joseph Lunar (6 months ago)
To be honest I’m totally against that
reggie thora (6 months ago)
Hey, getting an ex back is the greatest feeling in the world! However, if you want to make it happen within 2 weeks and make her want to stay with you (without having to manipulate her), just Google Treitan Mellory's website. You'll have her almost stalking you within the first week lol.
SouthernBelleBEE (7 months ago)
If he didn’t want to lose me, he shoulda just stuck with it. Like 10 weeks no contact. I’m good. ❤️
SouthernBelleBEE (4 months ago)
He contacted me that once. He has not. Thank God.
Abz J (5 months ago)
Has he contacted you since?
black night (7 months ago)
My ex keep asking for us to be friends . I said yes because saying no was not getting through. But I am not putting any effort into it, I'm always too busy or too Tired, after all in our Journey they taught me how to live without them. And I thought them how they could Never Live without me. It was hard To reach where I am emotionally, I Thought I could of never live Without them, now I'm happy Again . Not the same happy but a different happy . Happy I did not give up on me . Happy I'm still Here , happy I know What its like to be rejected. And most of all happy watching my life heal
Ann ocampo (4 months ago)
Jump start :( it is. I ask my self everyday, what should i do today to make me happy? And i struggle. But im hoping one day i will no longer feel that
black night (4 months ago)
+Ann ocampo this is one fucking hard point in life, that only the strong survived . Basically when I sat down with myself and analyze the situation I was grieving over the loss of a dream. So I set out to make new dreams.
Ann ocampo (4 months ago)
Jump start i hope i could reach that point too. Happy.
black night (4 months ago)
+Ann ocampo thanks
Ann ocampo (6 months ago)
Jump start happy for you. :)
auto uk (5 months ago)
She say I wana be you frd after 6ys. And we do sex something. Then what ?
derblicker 303 (8 months ago)
I tried my best to stay friend with my ex girl- she distanced herself from me.. so it was nothing from my site i did wrong... she just cut me off one day and kicked me off from facebook- she still stays cold hearted everytime we see us for the moment maybe we re arange the things but it will take time...and as she gives me almost everytime the silent treatment i still don´t know whats her problem...
Michael Bruce (10 months ago)
Thanks I stumbled across this video. It's been one hell of an emotional rollercoaster 5 months into our separation. I've learned a lot. We have finally been able to be in each other's presence and talk and carry on share laughs ECT. I've been able to apologize for several things that led to our demise. She is currently and I believe a rebound relationship that she says is going good and happy. I can't help but to think her asking me to be friends is a good thing for me to potentially showcase what I've learned in hopes that sometime we might be able to get back together and I might be able to write my wrongs. And apply but I've learned
Lion Phoenix (10 months ago)
Your ex wants to stay friends because she wants to go looking and see if she can upgrade but she is not sure if she can. So the whole friend thing is so she can keep track of you if she is not able to upgrade. That is what is going on. She is using you as a fallback plan. In other words DON"T DO IT.
Clown Earz (3 months ago)
From my exp. With this, they may try but never find a better option sp they come back to you with more feelings of respect and attraction. Whne they do, tell them that if they leave again, you will walk and never look back. Sometimes women do have a hard time understanding their own emotions
maverickM249 (4 months ago)
+Juno Callow Yeah, grass isnt greener anywhere you go, you actually have to deal with the soil in front of you and make it grow, but sometimes people are better off just starting over with a different kind of soil. In the analogy, you're accepting a different set of problems when you hop the fence over to the next yard, however different or similar.
maverickM249 (4 months ago)
Yeah, unless you love the girl that much and you know she can't lol I havent seen that but orbiters dont tend to win anything.
Juno Callow (4 months ago)
“upgrade”
Jona Olabinjo (9 months ago)
Lion Phoenix .. why don’t do it. .. u are not on their mind and u also don’t know how they began and what they already gone true together, u don’t know the depth and length of their feeling so don’t just conclude like that... we lean from our mistakes and we can also fix things right from mistakes..
Jessica Richards (11 months ago)
I do not want to talk to ex .
Renee Davis (1 year ago)
I've learned over the course of my years of long-term relationships, that I will never go backwards and will never be their friend.
Why Me (1 year ago)
For me I see it as we either are friends or if we get in a relationship and break up it's done period. None of this friends after a relationship bullshit I couldn't bear being friends with someone I loved so much, and to me if you really wanted me you would have stayed with me not leave then come back playing this little childish unsure game. If you want me you stay with me end of story.
Frankie Stone (8 months ago)
sky blum that how I feel man thanks for writing that.
Mosenie Harpley (1 year ago)
I agree with most of what you say. This person you spend 4 or 5 years of your life with. Why wouldn’t you want this person in your life? There’s dating there’s relationships. I cherish all my relationships and I didn’t date much so the few people I’ve had I want them in my life for ever and I want the very best for them always. Sometimes in life things just don’t work out bad circumstances not bad people. 💕🤗
Soniya (10 months ago)
Because there’s s billon other people to be friends with!! Move on
Francine Moody (1 year ago)
So, this advice contradicts (the "they're not quite done with you" part) with what he said on the same issue a few months prior to this video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5wRCiGNyiI So, which one is it?
Cierra Dunbar (1 year ago)
This guy and I we're friends in college. We hung out a couple times then he texts me and says "Don't take this the wrong way, but we're not going to kick it anymore, we're two different people?" Yet, he still follows me on Snapchat after I deleted him and watched my story.
U are handsome and smarth
Marcy Allison (1 year ago)
If you have feelings for someone, never go friend zone! It will only be torturous for you!
Rachel Brudenell (1 year ago)
can't do it. All or nothing
Capricris (3 months ago)
Yup same.
maverickM249 (4 months ago)
Respect. Less pain in the end. People that can must like the pain.
Why Me (1 year ago)
Rachel Brudenell same.👌🏼
Sharlene Marten (1 year ago)
My now ex boyfriend texted me four days ago and said that "i love you but we should just be friends" (we were in a long distance relationship.) I was sad because we were getting close to two years in a relationship, but now it ended. I deleted him off of everything cause I was mad, but now I feel bad for it cause I still have feelings for him. I hope that one day we start talking again, because he was the only person that always had good advices, good sense of humour, and always made my day a whole lot better.
Why Me (1 year ago)
Sharlene Marten I feel the same way about my ex I loved him to death, and I actually blocked him on everything and said some pretty nasty things to him when he said he wanted to be friends because he made it sound like he wanted to fuck around with other people and that made me upset, and it was actually a long distance relationship too expect unlike you I don't see any hope for the future sadly.
soyjaimie (1 year ago)
My ex broke up with me and he asked if we could be friends, but since we split he's said that he needed a few days to process his emotions and he's been refusing to speak to anyone, not me or his sister or anyone. It's hurtful since we both have feelings for each other but I guess he just needs some space?
Carlos Perez (1 year ago)
maybe... as long as he's not dating anyone there's still hope.
Nita B. (1 year ago)
Great information! thanks for sharing❤
zeuchehcuez (1 year ago)
Touche'~
John Banks (2 years ago)
Any Ex asking to be a friend is definitely a narcissist. Run for the hills. healthy minds grieve and move on period.
Vegan Hea (3 months ago)
John Banks not true
Anastasiya Rakova (8 months ago)
Wtf. Some people genuinely love each other and care about each other and still want the other person in their life. Just because you aren't compatible romantically doesn't mean you aren't compatible as friends. Also I wanted the same thing as him. You calling me a narcissist now? Dude stop.
Dark Caesar (1 year ago)
My ex said she couldn't understand why i didn't want to be friends, which I find ridiculous. We tried the friends route before and ended up in the same cycle but somehow she just can't understand.
Jonathan Kidd (1 year ago)
John Banks My ex calls me a narcissist and I wanted to be friends, so we're friends. I don't see how anything has to do with narcissism. On another note I'm pretty great.
Divin3ly Awak3ned (1 year ago)
John Banks i said that to him and he insists he's not a narcissist... and I want to move on and not be attached to anymore pain...we were together 5 yrs and now he wants to be friends...but still.calls me honey and babe... I dont wanna be confused... I will be his friend because we have a child, but he still acts romantically smh
C. Willock (2 years ago)
This guy wanted money. he would beat around the bush then ask for money. when I ended the relationship he called, It was money he wanted. I stopped answering the phone. He didn't want a full relationship, but he wanted me to buy him things.
Pricklepie (5 months ago)
He is a dumb screw. Just tell him Get Lost ! #brokeniggaz
C. Willock (2 years ago)
I won't let my ex talk with me because he always wanted money and is deceitful about it. He never paid me back!. He kept asking for more money. I got tired giving because he never bought me anything he promised. I don't want him asking me for anything, so I didn't accept his friend request on Facebook. My issues with him can't be resolved. We never spoke to each other much without it involving money anyway. That's what ended the relationship. I feel he wanted to add me on Facebook to request money. I was hiding from him.
Emo Half Kawaii (2 years ago)
my ex texted my friend about me, that one day he'll have me as his friendship... but I chose not to cuz there was problem so... Am not gonna let him see me ever.. it's better that way..
Emo Half Kawaii (2 years ago)
my ex bf was talking to be my friend about him willing to be friends with me I have no interest on contacting him cuz he moved on and has a new gf
Sebunsutaa (2 years ago)
It's been 3 months since my ex-girlfriend had left me (for good). Now, she's been trying to get my attention by messaging me (on skype), texting me (via phone) and even calling me (via phone) but, I haven't reciprocated it at all. I've actually avoided her. Now, I noticed that she doesn' t even put any effort in trying to get a hold of me. Mainly it's just her asking some questions or, saying hi or, even to the point where she talks to me like nothings ever happened. I had no replied back to her and by impulse (since I still want her back) lashed out at her (verbally). We were in a long distant relationship so, it's kind of difficult to get a hold of her presence. She laughed at me when I told her "Why do you just message me randomly then, go back to avoiding me/ ignoring me (minding her own business). She tells me, "I don't need you LMFAO". The messaging lasts for about 15 minutes and I asked tell her, "I was only trying to see if we can still work out, to see if I can still get you back". She then replies to me, "I just want to be friends, we don't benefit each other (how do we not benefit each other???). I still question myself on what she means about her wanting to still be friends. In the past (during the 3 months) time we talked, we were over dramatic and said to each other "I don't need you in my life, goodbye" Please, help me out, what does this all mean? What should I do? I've been depressed for 3 months now, constantly downing 1-2 bottles of liquor to myself (not trying to brag). I hate the way my life is, the way I'm living it but, I'm to weak...
Jona Olabinjo (9 months ago)
Carlos Perez ..bro.. it’s only you know what you are feeling deeply inside you when it’s come to ur ex issues, I totally understand ur situation and been through same situation before also, if both are still in contact observe her doing and character, if u feel any positive energy In the observation then make a move.. if both parties are truly In love before then u are both going through same adversary.. don’t let anyone mislead ur thoughts..
Carlos Perez (1 year ago)
Sebunsutaa from reading your story bro you should be happy that girl is outta of your life... stop talking to her completely
Sebunsutaa (1 year ago)
I am 24 yrs old, don't even remember posting a message (nor even knowing it's been that long). I gave up on her, she wasn't worth it. She's still stuck in a miserable situation and, so am I though, I am slowly growing out of it. I'm tired of being a baby at this age and it's not even respectable. I'm a man and should be acting like one. She' s still going through lots of phases, she's just now finally realized that she's "not that ugly" (low-self esteem issues) but, just how she sees things in life is completely different how from what I see. Just recently ( to be exact about 3 months ago or so), she messaged me and I noticed that her breasts were just flopping out of her shirt. She then tells me, "oh yea, I don't wear bras anymore they annoy me". Then months before she finally forgot about me for good she started to get "jungle fever". She now seeks african american guys for hooking up but, relationship wise, she's down for anyone. I don't know and, I'm that I don't care anymore about everything but, sometimes I tend to bring up the past, she's even asked me this month (February 2017) if her and I could meet up in Cali (while she's on Vacation). After all those months of her rarely messaging me (1 message / every 1-2 months), she now wants to meet up? Yea right.
Hello there (1 year ago)
how old are you?
CHEW Backka (2 years ago)
my ex gf of 2 years broke up me out of the blue. she said she said i have no ambition and she does not feel secure ie i do not earn enough. i was teaching college math . i was heart broken but i did not beg and just ghosted. a couple of weeks after she texted me saying she was sorry for hurting me but she really did not see herself settling down with me but would like to be friends. i texted sure. 2 months later she asked me for help to shift her stuff to her new apt. i texted back no. that night she said she really needed help and tot i was a friend. i said i was busy( which i was) and that she could afford movers. one week later , she sent an text asking me to come to her new place and help set up her cable and pc. i was free but arranged a road trip over the weekend with some friends so i can tell her sorry road trip. she asked me out for coffee on a saturday afternoon 2 weeks later by text. i was free but said no. this time i did not give an excuse. i knew she was dating some rich lawyer so i figured the guy was working weekends and she needed company. finally she texted me saying i was a jerk for saying i would be a friend and then refusing to help or meet up. i texted back. sayng i do not help any of my guy friends move stuff or set up their cable why should i treat u any different? i told her i would only hang out with her if the.activity what i really enjoyed like hiking or catching a basketball game. she stopped texting me. now 9 months post break up i am fully healed up and dating a nice attractive girl and my ex gf wants to meet up to "talk". rich lawyer bf and her must have broken up . i did not keep tabs on her so i cant be sure but now i really do not care. i just texted no. one word. it has been 1 week and she has not texted me since . hopefully she gets the message i do not want to have anything to do with her.
Jiaqi Zhao (3 months ago)
Happy.for u bud, wish u all the best
mrigue56 (4 months ago)
You’re a boss
Scarlett .101makeup (1 year ago)
Honestly I applaud you my respects!!! She was a opportunist, interested bitch good job!
alex (1 year ago)
CHEW Backka you sir give me hope
liefek (1 year ago)
CHEW Backka omg congratulations!!
Corinthian64 (3 years ago)
Yeah i HATE my ex. I feel bad cause she is a really nice person, but she dumped me without warning and said she had no reason. Thing is she has noooo idea how i really feel and we are "friends" even though i really do hate her. any advice?
Krys (6 months ago)
To hell with her. Upgrade and leave her alone.
eduardo maldonado (2 years ago)
my advice is dump her ass and find new girlfriend. and a really nice person will not do what you said. A nice person will tell you exactly why she broke it off and give you a legitimate reason especially if you asked her. The reason she broke it off sounds to me is because it did not suit her own personal needs at the time. Staying friends will probably eat you up inside. Knowing she is with someone else when all this time you wanted to be with her. So it is better just to end it.
LunaLunx (2 years ago)
Tell her you need time apart to get over the break up, from there you can slowly drift away with a legitimate reason
jetsetwm (3 years ago)
I agree you should not be made to feel obligated to become friends and hangout with an ex. Specially when you have not spoken in years. Then both married to other people, started a new life and family.
jetsetwm (3 years ago)
I agree you should not be made to feel obligated to become friends and hangout with an ex. Specially when you have not spoken in years. Then both married to other people, started a new life and family.
Kenjie Articulo (3 years ago)
I Hope you can answer this question , how can i assure that my boyfriend will never go back to his ex ? what are the signs that he still love his ex ?
warren n/a (1 month ago)
Paivy Martin you are correct and I can’t argue with that. I know someone who recently found out her boyfriend cheated with his ex. She tried very hard to be good to him . Unfortunately she took him back after what he did.
Paivy Martin (1 month ago)
+warren n/a there is no such thing as being better, just be yourself. If they can't get with the program then they never liked you for you period.
warren n/a (2 years ago)
Kenjie Articulo if he has moved on from her and is really over her then it shouldnt be a problem..be a better gf than she was maybe.
AncientSoulTalk1 (4 years ago)
I hope you respond please do, my ex girlfriend wants to stay friends while we are at different schools and its her last year and her home life is very rough even from my experience, she says she still wants me to be there and she does too and she wants us to figure ourself out during this time. And she wants us to to build a friendship so when the time comes we will have that really really really strong connection again.. What should I do ? I would love your advice man
Jona Olabinjo (9 months ago)
AncientSoulTalk1 .. women’s don’t keep male friends if they do not need them... if a ex girlfriend still contacting u that mean she have an plan B on you.. make a move if u really want her back .. she still feeling for u and she’s waiting for u to unlock the matter cos she is missing some of ur special effects that the new guys can’t meet up to..
Tony Corazza (3 years ago)
+LAX 324 Agree with this guy ^
Cotne (4 years ago)
If u start loving her again then its obvious what u should do..O(∩_∩)O
Nel-Bel VIII (4 years ago)
I want to be friends with my ex and we agreed but we havent talked to each other since the break up, which was quite recent. I feel like he thinks that I may still hold feelings which I understand, but he was still an important asset to my life. Since he doesnt initiate does that mean that I should just let it go or should I initiate it myself. (Honestly it shouldn't matter who initiates it but for some reason in the back of my mind I want him too)
Jazzy Lovebugg (1 month ago)
Let go
Hayley Kelly (1 year ago)
Nel-Bel VIII im going through the same thing. just take some time for yourself then hit them up in a couple months
Elmo Palma (4 years ago)
Thanks

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